Flaw In The Design

Dear Mr. or Mrs. or um….er Miss. Ms. Herbal Essences People,

Let me first assure you this is not a complaint about not having those screaming orgasms while using your product, I’m a chick….I could tell she was faking, but it is a complaint letter or maybe a suggestion letter is a nicer way to put it.

I love your products, they smell really yummy, make my hair nice and soft and the purple one, well the purple one has done wonders in making sure my husband isn’t using my hair cleansing products, between the fruit infused aromas and the color…he won’t go near the stuff! So I am grateful and all but…there is a problem.




So when you make a super thick, hydrating conditioner, (again very lovely smelling) might I suggest actually trying to squeeze the stuff out of the bottle before unleashing this craptastic container on the unsuspecting, needing hydration public?! Sure the package looks kinda cool, the curvy shape is girlie and all but damn. I stand in the shower every morning…dreading having to wrestle with this damn thing when it comes time to condition. I’m all wet and soapy, usually still kind of sleepy and now I have to jam this freaking (again great smelling) bottle between my neck and shoulder, keep one hand cupped to catch the thickish goo while using my other hand…and my chin to try and squeeze the stuff out….I assure you, this is a far less pleasurable experience than your adds might suggest.



Try it, try using this stuff and if there is some woman in there telling you it’s fine, that chick has man hands…get someone else to try it!

Humbly Yours,
Pissy When Wet With A Neck Cramp