I
think I may have mentioned, like a couple seventy times, that I simply
adore getting my hands on a menu and getting my wine dork swerve on. I
absolutely dig the rush, the tingle really, of sorting through the onion
skinned pages of my mental taste and textural dictionary…picking things up,
taking a sniff, a virtual bite if you will, trying to click together the
Lincoln Logs of a menu and wandering around the shop trying to find a
wine that will best match, or better yet, frame that meal and give that,
“Please help me” customer the best possible combination of weight,
acidity, flavor and structure. This is a service that The Wine Country
offers that no other stores in the area do, this not only makes me proud
it pushes me even harder. My goal always being that anyone that comes
in looking for food and wine pairing advice walks away feeling as if
they were heard, their dish taken seriously and with bottles they can
feel confident will not only be to their liking but will be harmonious
with their meal. It’s what we do and it is one of my favorite parts of
the job. That being said, there are times when this particular
challenge, well it’s more like a mission impossible….
Now
I know people are kind of in love with the idea of food and wine
dinners, the romantic notion of a wine perfectly paired with each
course. I get it, hell I have those notions myself but the fact of the
matter is perfection in anything is rare and with food and wine, well
magnify that rarity by like a thousand. There are only a handful of
times that you will find that absolute perfect pairing and more often
than not, it’s when there are the least amount of ingredients involved.
Oysters and Muscadet or Sancerre, roast chicken and white Burgundy, goat
cheese and Sauvignon Blanc, aioli and Provencal Rose, French fries and
Blanc de Blanc all simple and stunningly beautiful together but add one
thing; a little cocktail sauce on that oyster, a spice rub on that
chicken or fruit chutney on that goat cheese, no matter how small the
change might seem it does in fact change the wine options, often
dramatically.
“I
need a wine to go with chicken” or “I’m looking for something that will
go with pasta” well those things tell us nothing really, I mean unless
you are actually going to eat plain chicken or a plate of sauce free
pasta, we need to have all the information to make the best possible
suggestion and even then, well sometimes there just isn’t a wine up to
the task. As versatile as wine is there are times, when no matter how
badly you want it to be, there is no way wine and food pairing
“perfection” can be attained, often…with the menus that I have come
across as of late and the rather trying trend of piling on of “more” ala
Emeril and Bobby Flay well wine is downright unwelcome. Trust me, kills
this wine geek to admit that, to concede that no matter how much we
tout wine and its place at the table that there are some tables….some
dishes where wine just doesn’t have a place.
So
what do we wine geek, pairing freaks do in such situations? Well much
to the annoyance of some of our “Help me” customers we are brutally
honest…okay not brutally, it’s not like we stand there saying, “Dude,
are you high?! Why in the hell would you want to serve Moroccan spiced
lamb with mango chili chutney with a side of blue cheese grits?! An
actual course for a menu we were brought last week. Not only does that
sound hideous to me, those two things on one plate but we could not
think of one wine that was going to do anything good to that mess. When
the customer was told, flat out, that there was no wine that was going
to taste really good with that, that the flavors there were all
pretty….um, aggressive and they might want to consider a “lighter beer”
for a match to them, we were met with a shrug and a, “we want to do a
wine pairing dinner not a beer pairing dinner. So whatever wine you
think would be an okay match is fine” that kind of shit right there just
baffles the hell out of me.
So
you want to do a wine and food dinner but you pick foods that are in no
way wine friendly and then try and bend a wine to fit into this crazy
mixed up bag of flavors…..well no wonder there are people out there that
think pairings are a load of horseshit. Kind of like the couple that
kept me tied up for a solid half an hour teaching them about French
wines, which they admitted they knew nothing about and after explaining
harmony at the table, balance and texture they told me, “Okay so we want
a Bordeaux (they had heard Bordeaux was the best French wine…best for
what I don’t know) that will go with a Chinese buffet of mostly fish and
vegetables. Oh and it needs to be from an odd year”….head imploding.
Or the woman that was doing a big company dinner and needed a Cabernet
Sauvignon for New York steaks and grilled sea bass, (they were serving
both you see) and when told that there really wasn’t a Cabernet that
would be great with grilled sea bass told me, “Okay. Well just pick
whatever Cabernet you think would be best with the fish then”…..picture
my scrunched face here. When these things happen I get all bunched up,
twisted and irked. Stomp around after they leave pointing my finger and
bemoaning the fact that they “don’t get it!” but it occurred to me a few
months back…sometimes it’s me that doesn’t get it.
Many
of these people just don’t care. It’s the doing of the dinner, the
planning the menu, the having friends over, the mere idea of it all that
pleases them. It’s fun and for some, makes them feel kinda fancy, the
actual balance of flavors….well that’s not the point for these cats, (I
mean c’mon, Moroccan spiced lamb, fruit and chilies AND a side of blue
cheese grits?!) and no matter what we dorks say, how often we tell them
that Opus One and oysters is a bad pairing, it doesn’t matter. It’s what
they like and honestly, we have no business telling them anything
different. For someone that preaches balance all the time it became very
clear to me that I needed a little of my own. So what if our Stella
Rosa, (a sweet sparkling red that tastes kinda like marshmallows)
customers drink that wine with their steak or spaghetti and meatballs.
It may give me the gag shivers but they dig it and putting a bottle of
Barbera d’Alba or Cotes du Rhone in their hand, while a better match for
the food…is not a match for those people and all that’s gonna do is
turn them off wine, not the smartest move for a store that relies on
return customers right?!
So
while these pairing deals are a favorite part of my gig they can, at
times, be little more than a head cracking dance of frustration and
bewilderment. It’s a fine line between offering assistance and just
being an ass and for all my talk about harmony and balance there is
nothing more harmonious than watching a customer walk out the front
door, bottles in hand, grin on their face because their local wine
merchant actually listened to what they wanted. Oh I’ll still offer my
suggestions, tell them why I think that Petite Sirah they have in mind
might be a “Little much” for the Bacalhau dish they are making and
suggest something more along the lines of Pinot Gris or Pinot Blanc….try
my damndest to get them to take both and experiment for themselves,
(which is how I snag em’ and end up with return “please help me”
customers) watch them leave with my fingers crossed that the little
switch will go off for them when they have an actual pairing moment.
Teaching
not preaching…..rough but if it brings more people to the wine drinking
table, I’m all in. Baby stepping our customers into the world of food
and wine pairing, explaining the wine should be a component to the
dishes on the table and not some afterthought or accessory. This too is a
service that The Wine Country offers, that no one else in town does,
and for the ten people that shrug off our recommendations there are
fifty that willingly take our suggestions and have faith in our years of
figuring this shit out. Good odds and the more we handle these “food
fights” with grace and not dogma….well the more people will come to
trust that we like know what we’re talking about and junk.
Now if I could just get those chefs and “Food & Wine” writers to quit making my job so goddamn hard! Fuckers…..
10 comments:
My Gorgeous Samantha,
Yeah, that food and wine thing is mostly about valiant attempts with the occasional home run. Sommeliers (was I ever really one?--hard to remember some days) get asked those pairing questions all the time, too. And after a lot of thought, and a lot of questions about the food and exactly how it's prepared, and a final couple of recommendations, comes the questioner's casual remark, "But I really just like Pinot Noir." I used to always wonder why they bothered to ask me when they already knew what they were going to drink, appropriate to the meal or not.
And yet if it's Pinot Noir that makes them happy, so be it. You've got all that right, as you always have. People are magic. It's our place, I guess, to just shake our heads in amazement.
I love you so!
So what red wine should I have with my bits of chocolate for dessert?
Heeeee heeeeee heeeeee, I crack myself the fuck up! Might be that I'm downing a bottle of rosé on an empty stomach after just giving up on work for the day -started at 8:30?
Romes:
Banyuls is the answer, for most of us.
Sam:
Yes indeed, you have to just let them be. Took running a tasting room to figure it out--fast. First week, a woman announced that she drank only Riesling with everything that she ate. I asked if that included steak and tomato sauce; she asked, "Why wouldn't it?"
Great article Sam. It took me a long time to admit that you just can't find the perfect wine for every dish. Imagine my heartbreak when I had to admit that kimchee just wasn't meant for Burgundy, white or red.
I was making plenty of scrunchy faces here just reading your descriptions of mis-matches! But you said it in your post - some folks are primarily interested in the interaction with YOU, the expert, and less cognizant of whether or not their kooky food selections will pair perfectly. They love the experience of seeing what you come up with -- good or not quite so fabulous.
The picture of the burger with nearly the whole kitchen sink on top was it in a nutshell. Beer!
The fun part is that food/wine pairings are endlessly entertaining, fun to explore and challenging in a good way to see what mixes well, fantastically or was a disaster on the palate. Smile! You provide a great service that people seek out!
Ron My Love,
You and I have discussed this a bunch of times and you know, better than most actually, how much I stress and love the whole pairing thing. I fucking love the challenge and the reward when it does work and my customers are thrilled. Gawd, I am such a dork....remind me again why it is you love me? I love you too!!
Jess,
Asshole. That being said Thomas is right, if you MUST have wine with your chocolate I recommend Banyuls although for your joker ass I should say Fino Sherry.
Thomas,
We do what we can and just have to be happy that people are drinking wine right?
Sonya,
I miss you!!! And yes, kimchee is a wine killer but, damn I love it so.
Marcia,
Beer is often the best wine for the job but there are always people that insist on having wine, no matter how inappropriate. Not much I can do there other than shrug and smile and try and find the least gross pairing. Mostly though, when they are like that, I will just fine the best "X" and just give up on the whole pairing thing...then everyone is happier.
I'm still trying to figure out what would possess someone to serve blue cheese grits with Moroccan spiced lamb. Color me baffled.
Just ran across you blog. YOU ROCK! Love your edge. Fabulous writing really. I am http://saintorr.tumblr.com/
Steve O.
nycmasseur.com
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